Chapter three: Květák brings in Králík

Translation

  • Lemy: Dude, I had not idea Květák plays something.
  • Juan: I did.
  • Lemy: Let's take him in!
  • Květák: I have two new friends, a bassist and a drummer.
  • Králík: It needs someone for the rhythm guitar!
  • Juan: Let's rock, homies!
  • Králík: Metal!
  • Postman: Bullshit! You have been conscripted!

And now for the narration.

 

Chapter three - KVĚTÁK BRINGS IN KRÁLÍK, FIRST NAMES OF THE BAND AND THE OBSTACLE OF ENLISTMENT

During breaks in rehearsing, which are otherwise filled with smoking and boozing, the band at times idly stares out of the basement windows into Dřevíč, and what they keep seeing is this cauliflower-like hair appearing at the nearby house. After closer investigation, the guys found out that this fabulous bush belongs to a guy named Karel, who is secretly, to avoid his parents seeing him, playing a homemade guitar. His cauliflower-like visage is so striking that he instantly becomes another member of the team, and is nicknamed accordingly, that is, “Květák” (Cauliflower).

The new line-up works perfectly; the guys however want more. “It does not sound bad, but what we need is a second guitar. Its player however has to be of a particular look to help boost our image”, says Květák one day. That requirement is ultimately fulfilled by Jarda, thanks to his unmistakably rabbit-like teeth, who has been hanging around then band den for some time now. Once in, he keeps claiming that thanks to him the band will become even more metal and set on a path towards a bright future. In return, he will forever be called “Králík” (Rabbit).

The year is (still) 1988.

Despite the band going well, guys are still unsure where their metal inclinations are, or what to call their pack for that matter. Initially, they pick the name IMAGO, later EXEKUTOR and keep frequenting culture commissions, presenting their music, hoping the Reds will allow them to be an officially recognized band. Slowly but surely they mature into extreme metal orthodoxy, disregarding any other metal styles. The ascendancy however hits a wall, when the tragedy, called enlistment orders, arrives, bringing the band to an utter halt. Yet, thanks to calling in some favors, the whole pack is stationed in the nearby city of Nové Město nad Metují, thus allowing for a considerable leisure in the boot camp. Chilling out in the boiler room, the comm. center, or in radio station, as well as other similarly strategically significant assignments help the guys to survive the gloomy times of military service, so much so that an alcohol poisoning looms on the horizon at times – too much booze, very few girls, and even less of music. Demotion for over-consumption of alcohol and other disciplinary measures are regular parts of the band setlist.

The year is 1990.

Editorial note: in the unfortunate reality of communist Czechoslovakia indeed every band, if it were to function legally, had to be assessed by special commissions to ensure their music is ideologically proper and not counter-revolutionary. For Czech heavy metal bands this meant that they were banned on the spot. And not only metal bands.